Walking

As I walk away, I can hear her breathing heavy. She is fighting the gigantic urge to scream after me to ask me to stay. I have left a half drunk steamy cup of rooibos tea on her mahogany coffee table that she kindly made before she knew that I was going to drop a bomb on her pride and prejudice. It is a bitterly cold winter morning and tears are stinging my nose and eyes and I can feel that my life from this moment will never be the same again. I am 23 years old and have been feeling pretty sorry for myself and thinking that I will never amount to anything, or at least most of my high school years and early work years I have been reminded so. On this freezing Zimbabwean winter morning my icicle fingertips have found the courage to tell my brain that they are itching to punch a keyboard and free my caged heart so it can explore new, incredible horizons. This will not happen in Bulawayo. Not while I am still ashamed to tell Nomalanga that I kiss boys. Or that Taurai pinched my butt while whispering in my ear that I am the only man he will ever love. Isn’t it funny how easily programmable our minds and emotions can be? But not today… On this here day I own this piece of ground I am standing on. I am chief of my own destiny and no emotion bully will tackle my ego. So I push my cassette into my Walkman and listen to the sounds of Bhundu Boys as they sing about Simbimbino. This bitch can wait. I choose to walk away and let her know I would rather walk than talk to her. I am done talking.

Photo by Mgcini Nyoni

Nameless

Frank Malaba © 2015


Frank Malaba is an enigma to Zimbabwe, the country of his birth. Such a distinction is not defined by his talent as a poet, artist, writer, but by his advocacy, as a gay African male. He STANDS, though persecuted, he STANDS, to love, and he speaks his truth. [An excerpt from his voice in his article – A Thorn in the Flesh]. Malaba loves his country, but fights for his “very being.” He invites all gay Africans to stand with him, to fight for the right be treated as a vital participants in African culture that deserve to be respected. His blog, Frank Malaba’s Prosetry, invites all kindred spirits to speak, love, and heal.

Be first to comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.